Warning - This one is really long. You are under no obligation to read. I won't be offended! But there is a cute picture at the end for those who would just rather scroll down.
Alex has been in our family for four days now. Though we’ve had to make a few adjustments, we all love having him here.
Getting him here didn’t happen quite like I’d visualized it, but I think it worked out to be the best way.
When we were waiting for Esther to be born we wanted her as soon as possible. She was a week late, so when the doctor asked if I wanted to be induced we jumped at the chance. I didn’t see any drawbacks to having our precious little girl sooner. I was also quite sure I wanted an epidural. Who in their right mind would want pain?
Then I found out a few things. One – when you rush a baby, labor can take a lot longer. They started inducing around 8:00 pm the night before she was born. After awful contractions all night long, it still wasn’t until 9:00am that I was even open enough to be considered “in labor.” She wasn’t born until 10:30pm. Two – induced contractions are really painful and frequent. Three – epidurals mean more than just not having pain. When you’re completely numb for a long time you have to be repositioned often by a nurse (not a comfortable thing). You have to have a catheter because you can’t get up to go to the bathroom. You have no idea when to push, or even how to push the baby out since you can’t feel anything down there. You can’t walk for a long time afterward. Or at least, that’s how my first epidural was.
Everything was worth it to have Esther. But I decided that I could learn from those experiences with William. We were on a tight schedule (he was due over a short Christmas break, then we would all need to fly back to Grenada together), so inducing was still necessary. I didn’t want an epidural though. I had no idea how to cope with the pain, but I figured I’d try somehow.
Thankfully I was a little closer to being ready when the induction started with William. I was only in labor about 10 hours. In the end, the long day of hard and frequent contractions got to me and I asked for the epidural. This one didn’t make me so completely numb as the last one, and since I waited longer to have it there weren’t as many nasty side effects. But there were enough to still make me want to try going natural the next time. Again – anything I went through was more than worth it to have William.
So on to Alex. There was no hurry this time – so I was determined to go into labor myself. I still had some sort of idea of sticking it out through the pain and avoiding the epidural. Then a month or two ago my friend lent me a book about hypnobirthing and I was sold. Though I couldn’t completely buy into everything in the book, there were some awesome relaxation, breathing, and visualizing activities in there that I knew would help me make it through (as long as I didn’t have to be induced). I wasn’t sure if I could relax in a hospital setting, but I wanted to give it a try. I also must admit that I didn’t practice nearly as much as the book said was necessary.
Though my doctor was kind enough to give me a little extension on her regular 1-week-overdue-inducement policy, I still wasn’t sure I could avoid it. Alex is now my first child to come into this world on his own.
Around 2:00am Monday morning (after only being three days overdue!) I started having mild contractions. They were sort of regular – like every 15 minutes or so, but nothing like the induced contractions I’d had before. I wasn’t sure if this was real labor or not, but I alerted Cameron to it before he went off to the hospital for the day. We went about business as usual. I took Esther to Joy School. William and I went to K-Mart to buy him some new socks (he outgrew his old ones a while ago, and was also very upset that we could only find one red sock). The contractions kept coming, but not enough for me to be completely convinced I was in labor. I packed a couple of bags though, just in case.
I picked up Esther a little before noon. Somewhere between noon and one those contractions started to be strong enough that I could consider them real. William went down for a nap and Esther played by herself while I tried to relax. It worked pretty well. Coping with those contractions wasn’t nearly as difficult as it had been with the other two. When Will woke up I had a talk with Esther about how I thought her baby brother was coming, and I’d need her help. She took charge like a pro. She got snacks out for her brother and made sure I was resting. I was so proud.
Around 3:30 the contractions were coming often enough that I figured it was nearing the time to get to the hospital. I paged Cameron and he came home right away. We packed up the kids and took them to the Ross’s house (Thanks again!!!) and were off to the hospital. By then my contractions were about 2-3 minutes apart, and I was still doing okay.
We were in my birthing room by 4:30. Cameron, the nurse, and my doctor were awesome. Basically I just laid down with my eyes closed doing my silly sounding breathing etc. Cameron answered all the questions for me. For the most part everything was quiet and if it wasn’t for all that pain I’d say it was even serene. I didn’t even know there were people in the room until I opened my eyes once. I was happy with how things were going.
Then after a couple of hours more, the labor was getting really intense. My contractions were so hard and frequent that I couldn’t catch my breath between them anymore. Something inside me said, “You don’t have to go through all this pain.” I ignored it for a little while, but then listened. I (a little grudgingly) asked for an epidural. It was around 7:00pm.
My doctor checked, and I was just at a 6. I figured that meant hours more of labor and it was getting to be too much. The anesthesiologist was there in a couple of minutes. He did an amazing job. I know a lot of people prefer the numbness, but I don’t. I didn’t go numb with this one. I could still feel everything and move myself around just fine. It just took that sharp edge off the contractions so I could get myself focused again.
When I lay back down (just minutes after I was a 6) my doctor went to break my water and I was at an 8. After breaking my water I was suddenly at a 9. Then while they were prepping for baby to be born I needed to push. After just a couple of pushes Alexander was born. He came at 7:24pm. He came out so fast that he didn’t even have a cone-head.
I’d had the epidural for less than a half hour. Though now I see that I probably could have gone just another half hour without it, I’m really glad I got that epidural when I did. I still got to feel everything, but I could enjoy him coming into the world so much more since it didn’t seem like I had to struggle for survival. I had it for such a short time that I didn’t have to have a catheter and I could walk almost immediately afterward. There was no numbness, so I didn’t have to wait for that to go away. It wasn’t quite how I pictured this birth, but I think it turned out better anyway.
The best part of all is that we now have an amazing new member of our family. Any birth is a good one when you get a baby at the end!
